I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
