i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
