I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
