I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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