I feel great
I just peed on a car
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
