Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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