absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
