Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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