I like my sex mixed with concussions.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
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