I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Randomize