We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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