Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
