Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i will never coherently bang her
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
