Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize
