Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
