ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
He better not be in your backpack
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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