I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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