do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
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