some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
