she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
