i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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