Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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