NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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