Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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