I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
