not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
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