this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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