just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
he fucked my hip out of place.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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