so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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