1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Randomize
