im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
