I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
