i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Randomize