This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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