Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
