I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize