soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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