I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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