marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
