I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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