i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
