He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
So much rum. So many feels.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
