and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Couch. On fire.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
