shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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