Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
