You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
