Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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