u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
