69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
