Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
