nut hugger
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
